It has been close to 2 years since I've updated this space...quite a long time I must say. It's always Facebook now, no one uses this anymore...what a shame. But as most you know, I hardly go online for MSN, and FB is where people leave me messages. Nowadays its just emails galore for me. It has reached the point where I'm checking emails twice a day to get upates and when I choose to not check for one day, I have 30 emails sitting in different inboxes waiting to be read.*sigh* Email-holic is what I'm becoming, which is quite sad in my opinion.

 

How I wish I could be a shopaholic instead and not have to worry about the credit card bills.

 

This is a very random update as I am trying to avoid studying for my midterm tomorrow. Bad practice as I know but can never cure myself of. Enough procrastinating for now. I will get back to work.

 

Life continues to be as busy as ever. So many things going on at the same time, so many assignments due, so much work to catch up on. A lot of pressure but its what drives me to do my work. I've always handled pressure pretty well, except for occasional breakdowns. Recently a friend has been pretty blue about herself, and I just wanted to tell her that everything would be ok. Yes, some people are dropping out of our program, some people are switching to part-time studies, but that doesn't mean that we should be affected. Stress is always there, even if you want to avoid it. But as I know from experience, the more you try to run away, the more strongly you are pulled towards it. Its called gravitational force of attraction, maybe not but whatever. Running away or choosing to be in denial doesn't do anything to solve the problem at hand, it just worsens it.

 

I know that we always say that we should live for ourselves and not for others, but what happens if you lose the strength to live for yourself? Then do you have to live for other people? And what if other people don't even "need" you anymore? Do you just go off and die? Or say, oh, no one needs me, no one cares, and I don't have the will to live?

 

No, I don't think so. Life is a precious and sacred thing and no one, no one, should take it for granted. Just the fact that we are still living, and not having to struggle to survive, should give us the strength to continue to live. And it just pisses me off when people start talking about their own deaths, and especially if they're serious about it. Its ok if you're an old lady at the age of 85 to think about death, but not if you're a healthy, able being at the prime of your life.

 

Although engineering is hard, it creates a great deal of stress, it makes you want to just end it all, it makes you depressed at times, think of how much more that we can do in the future. Think about all the things that you haven't done with your life.

Stress is only stress because you make it into stress. Pressure doesn't always come from other people, a lot of times its actually you who's pressuring yourself.

 

Conclusion? Life is beautiful, and we should all live it to its fullest. No regrets. That's what I call life.

 

生活依然很忙, 整个星期都有东西要交。觉得有压力，但我认为这是我力量的来源。最近有一个朋友经常说想死，说自己多没用什么的。无论我怎么跟她说，她还是这样的认为。没错，最近有好几个人都说要转去读其他系，又或者转为兼职学生，但即使是这样，我们也不用被影响到。那是人家自己做的选择，他们没法继续读下去，是他们自己的事，与我们无关。压力无论在什么时候都存在。越是要逃避，越是解决不了问题。经验告诉我，逃避只是暂时性的，要彻底解决，就要勇敢的去面对。

 

经常说不要为了别人而活，要为了自己而活。但当连为了自己而活的力气都没有了，那该为什么而活？要把精神寄托在别人身上吗？别人不需要你的时候那该怎么办？真的要去结束一切，自寻短见吗？

不，生命是多么可贵的。任何人都不应该轻易放弃自己的生命。能够活着，不用为基本的生存能力担心就已经是非常幸福的事情了。想一下这个世界比你惨得多的人有多少，你就应该明白我的意思了。如果说你是80多岁的老人，偶尔想下自己的生命可能剩下的时间不多，那还情有可原，但现在我们正值最青春、最灿烂的岁月，你觉得你有资格说自己的生命有多可悲吗？

即使读书是辛苦、是累。但毕竟压力的人为的，更多时候是来自自己。不去想，不去担心，人也会活的快乐得多。

最终的结论，生命是可贵的，是美丽的。每个人都应该珍惜，去享受生活。活得没有遗憾、不后悔，那就是生活。

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I'm taking a communications course now and our professor asked us to prepare a few lines of poetry. As I was searching for a poem, I came across one by Robert Frost that I read some time ago in English class. I've always found this particular one very moving and the meaning behind the words really does fit my situation. Maybe its because of his writing style, but I always find that I like his poems better than others. Here's the poem:

The Road Not Taken

 

I've just uploaded a few pictures during my trip to another province in China. Its a bit late since they were taken over 2 months ago but still...enjoy them as you can. More of these pictures can be found at  http://invisiblyeternity.spaces.live.com/. Just click on the album that has over 100 pictures in it and you'll see all the scenery you want.

 

So school has started and I've been getting into the studying mode. I'm quite proud of myself since I've done some reading in advance so all is good. Frosh week was crazy and tons of fun as I was a frosh leader this year. Somehow prancing around in your coveralls and ordering frosh around is quite fun and even though it is very tiring, I think I'll try it again next year.

 

Anyways, thats it for now and I hope everyone is enjoying being back at school (or skule). Best wishes for the year!